Get the World's Very Best Monkey Butlers Working for You!

Nothing says success like having your very own monkey butler. So why not forget all those tiresome chores and leave them to a lower level primate? We've scoured the earth in search of the world's most talented monkeys and trained them to do all the jobs you hate. Best of all, your butler monkey will work for peanuts (plus the occassional pack of cigarettes - we tried using patches to get them to quit but with all that hair it didn't really work)

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One of the star performers of our butler monkey training school, Dimitri is always eager to please. A born entertainer, Dimitri particularly enjoys dressing up in drag and taking the kids ice skating. Brought up by Romanian gypsies, he is also a talented pickpocket and can quickly pay for himself.


Subject M1X

Having undergone a partial labotomy Subject M1X is unusually obedient for a monkey. Rescued from an Eastern European research facility, this outstanding butler monkey maintains a calm demeanour at all times (unless he sees someone dressed in a white coat, in which case he turns incredibly violent).




Having spent much of his life attending swish black-tie events, Bubbles is comfortable around celebrities and makes the perfect butler monkey for those who like to entertain in style. Due to some unsavoury habits learnt from a former master he is however unsuitable for working with children.


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Get a butler monkey before all your wanker mates do. Email us now!

Butler Monkeys are another winning concept of the Guerrilla Poetry Organisation